October 16, 2012

It isn't every day that I am invited to a former student's wedding.  Stephanie and I met her first year of high school in her Freshman English class during what was my first year teaching high school. She came from a small, private school and a strict dad.  Through her writing, I realized we had a lot in common.  I would also teach her sister in later years, and she would come back to visit and keep me updated on life often.  The real privilege came when she asked me to be her confirmation sponsor.    To be a part of her faith life and to be someone in which she could turn to was an honor I didn't take lightly.  Her family drew me close and despite language barriers at time with her extended family, they always included me in events important to Stephanie growing up.

It shouldn't have surprised me to receive an invitation to the wedding--what did?  She invited all of us, kids included!  That does not happen often in today's world. There have been baby showers and wedding showers, where kids aren't even invited anymore.  When I was a kid, it was potlucks and fun paper games that filled the event in people's houses or yards.  Today, fancy schmancy rules and kids are often excluded.

The mass was at my home church. . .with a singer I just adore.  Her ceremony was simple with a small wedding party--only her sister stood up with her and it was in English and Spanish.  She looked beautiful and happy and all grown up. Her reception was elegant but not stuffy. Kids dancing on the dance floor, putting in their glow in the dark fangs. . .a photo booth to dress up and have fun !  And the whole time, I couldn't take my eyes off of my kids--this was their first wedding.  Their eyes were wide and behavior great  as they got to participate in an "adult" event.

I remembered how families used to do things--it was more about being together than the fanciness of the event.  We used to want those closest to us to participate in such occasions as these people had invested love and time into us. . .who we had grown to be.  I remember my mom's family growing up. . .I looked forward to that girl time I would get to share with my mom and grandma.This event made me really appreciate those weekend showers with my mom. . .because the reality is, my own daughter and I have only shared one.  That just seems strange to me. Then again, I'm more family oriented than some--I take these special events in people's lives very seriously, but I take my own responsibilities to my family even more so.  Sometimes, we choose not to participate in certain events because all of us aren't included.  Sometimes the traditions of our smaller family have to surpass the obligations associated with the bigger one.

That's life.  That's how we choose to live it.  This weekend's wedding was an awesome event that I will always remember because it was a first for my kids and my first student to include us in such a personal, exciting event!!!