Dear Janessa,
Happy Birthday baby girl! Will I ever stop calling you my baby? Probably not. Prepare yourself. You are the last addition to our family. You completed us with your laugh, voice, smile, and hugs and kisses you dole out often and unexpectedly. You have blessed our lives in so many ways. This year you have changed in a lot of ways. You stopped wearing diapers to bed at night, you became a better friend to others since you seem to understand the concept of sharing now and you've made friends at school and at My Gym.
Lambie is still well loved and a bed buddy I don't see you living without soon. Last night I took this picture as I sat on your bed and prayed over you. The big kids weren't here and it reminded me of the night before you were born: how I was sad to have missed Thanksgiving BUT so excited when the Dr. said he would let you come out the next morning. Last night sleep was hard to come by just like it was on the eve of your birth as I was SO excited to meet this little one that would complete our family. Janessa Raylene, you are such a gift!
With the onslaught of days passing, all I can think about is how you are growing up right before my eyes and I can't get enough of the activities, crafts, or memories we make. It's like I inhale them deeply and I just want more time with my little girl who asks such sweet questions or exhibits such thoughtfulness for others. I love the way you put your hand on my face at bedtime. I love how you hook your arm around my neck when I lay next to you. I love the way, late at night you called to me and you told me, "I wanne be like you. I wanna be just like you when I grow up mama." It was 12:30 in the morning and I could have missed it but I didn't. What a beautiful Gift from God to hear you utter those words and to imprint them upon my heart and mind forever so that on the rough days, the long days, the sick days, the grumpy days. . .I can try to be the best version of myself for you.
Four-years-old and so much I'm learning from you. Your gentleness and your stubborness, the easy way you love, you hold, you embrace. . .you bring new meaning to ceasing the moment. There's a reason you are my last. There's a reason God waited to gift me you. Maybe mom was ready to grab hold of the dream and fully embrace it--be the best mom I can be and realize my mission field is my home front. Maybe baby. Maybe. . .
The rest for your eyes only. . .
Mom
Jeremiah 29:11
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