December 5, 2011

I wasn't going to write today.

I didn't feel I had anything much to say.

Life is good.  Great even. 

We are here; we are healthy; we are preparing for Christmas (in our hearts at least) as there are no outward signs around our house yet.

But then I woke up and opened my bible to review the Book of John and started off my email to my Good Morning Girls Group.

My short and simple check in looked a lot like a blog post so I thought I would share.

This morning I read John 5: 1-21 again.

Verse 15 stood out to me because I've been thinking a lot about it this weekend--"If we know He is listening when we make our requests, we can be sure he will give us what we ask for." Verse 21 ends with, "Dear Children, keep away from anything that might take God's place in your hearts."

Friday's events still have me reeling.  

On Thursday, my Advent devotion had me call someone I had been meaning to call.  

It was 9:18 before I was able to do so, but I called my neighbor and encouraged her in a message and let her know I was off work the next day.

Hours later she showed up needing to be near someone as she mourned the death of sweet little Manny. I shouldn't have been home--but I was.  

God.

 Unbeknownst to me, the school had grief counselors at the school as they told all the kids that a fellow classmate had died. 

I found it difficult--gut wrenching actually to watch (from my beautiful picture window form my house on the corner)parents pick up their kids throughout the day--often one or both in tears--clutching desperately at each other.  

Heartbreaking.
When Lene came home from school--the first thing she did was ask me in a somber voice if I knew what happened?  I nodded, with tear filled eyes (again) and hugged her. 

She allowed the closeness but soon after she pulled away and with confidence and determination she announced, "It's so sad, mommy but at least he gets to be in Heaven."
"Gets to be in Heaven. . ."
A verse flew front and center to my mind (bits and pieces--because you know how I am with verse--not too good, actually).. . . 

"He was indignant and said to them, "Permit the children to come to Me; do not hinder them; for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. 15 "Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it at all." 16 And He took them in His arms and began blessing them, laying His hands upon them." (Mark 10:13-16)

What does that mean?  

Can I be comforted in a moment like this if I have a faith like hers?

Children say what they mean and mean what they say usually.  

My daughter wasn't mourning him any less than I was--she simply was trusting that what the bible says is true--what we have told her when other loved ones have passed away is true too. 

Her sense of wonder about what this most beautiful place will look like as long as she keeps Jesus front and center in her life and ultimately the place she hopes to be one day is solace for her saddened heart.

.Amazing.

How all this ties in with John I'm unsure except to say--be mindful of your family more--do not let anything else take God's place in your heart--not your job, outside commitments, the television, or computer--whatever it has the potential to be.  Don't.  

Also, God answers our prayers--it may not look the way we want it to, but he answers us.  

Always.

Then he said to Thomas, "Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe." John 20:27

Is your faith always child-like?

Wondering if I'm alone in the fact that I don't think mine is. . .