May 16, 2012

Last weekend, I had the opportunity to catch up with a couple girlfriends as we attended a 40th birthday party. We all chatted aimlessly, which turned to breathlessly confessing our failings at mothering that week.  As we shared our struggle,  our frustration, and our embarrassment over certain mothering moments, I was moved by the compassion and empathy that poured out among the group. As we each boldly proclaimed our failings out loud, there was such a release. That mask of, "it's hard but I've got this," was lifted and we all relaxed into the familiar companion of friendship.  We commiserated, laughed, and encouraged each other.  It didn't matter if we worked full time, or part time, or not at all. We all spoke the same mothering language...and more days than not--it's hard no matter what your situation.

I was struck by something one of the girls said as she talked about her three year plan to go from working full time to part time.  When she was asked what she would do, she said maybe be an instructional aide or the lunch lady--but whatever she did, she would be the best!  And I could see that.  She would be the best and do her best with whatever job she chooses to do.  That is her personality.  She has a strong work ethic. . .much like all the women I am honored to call friends.

This simple reflection, following the conversation about our mishaps with motherhood made me think:   Am I always doing the best job I can with my kids? Do outward appearances sometimes matter more to me than how I've made them feel in the process?  When I'm in the classroom I give it my best, why should my home life be any different?  It shouldn't.