Sick Snag

After months of a relatively healthy Nessa Bessa, we hit a snag.  She has been out of school for a week now with a cough and a fever that has just decided to linger.  It has been frustrating to think she's getting better only to watch her wilt and wither, fever inflicted. . .again.  Her diet has been a steady stream of applesauce, chicken broth, and popsicles.  Because, let's face it she eats what she wants when she's sick and I'm okay with that.  I'm happy she takes down anything at all! She just looks so sad and so sickly!  We've ruled out pneumonia and have started a new antibiotic regiment so I hope she's on the mend.  She will stay home with me this week too, and truth be told, I don't mind a bit.

One day sooner than later, if she's anything like my Lene Bean I will have to practically beg her to stay home with a fever because she doesn't want to miss a day.  True story.  about two weeks ago, Anjalene was the sick one.  She stayed in bed Sunday and Monday (President's Day)  with the same cough and fever.  Rather than  rest and not push herself, as I wanted. . .she went back to school so she can keep up with her studies.
Junior high life, I tell ya!

We spent a lot of time in the doctor's office.  Two appointments and an x-ray to rule out pneumonia.  We like to keep ourselves busy as we wait drawing fun things and Janessa is into documenting it.  So there's that.

We've kept caught up on school work and read a ton of books.  Mercy Watson books, as well as Piggie and Elephant are our current favorites.  A sweet girl from her class, dropped off a library book for her to read, and her teacher gave her some love and stopped by with a gift today: love letters! She has received text messages from dear friends and the teacher's aide.  It feels so good to be loved and to see her light up because she genuinely loves school!

There has been plenty of down time.  So much so we might have finished a whole season of Fuller House. Not completely age appropriate, I know.  But most of it goes right over her head or she was asleep through.  And it was my favorite for so many years  a long, long time ago!

Did I mention Ernie is sick too?  Not that he has allowed it to slow him down either.  He worked every day last week, the weekend, and finally took a half day today to go see a doctor.  I guess I never had to worry about letting my crew down when I was sick and in education.  There were subs who could follow your plan so you didn't lose a whole day of teaching time.  His job is different.  If someone isn't there, it makes the job more difficult for the entire crew; hence, he doesn't miss much.

So, here we are at the start of March and my new normal hasn't really started yet.  But it's okay, the luxury of my job now is that I just go with the flow and pray I don't succumb to sickness!

This and That

I know I haven't finished with Hawaii yet, but life has been moving at warp speed.  So much good stuff happening around here!

 Little bought a fifth wheel and is working in Ventura right now.  His trailer is so nice!  I'm so proud of him and how hard he has worked to make a name for himself in his trade.  He is just like his dad.

 Ernie is still out of work due to his injury. I can not complain. It looks like surgery isn't necessary since the muscle tore away from the tendon, not the bone. . .according to the mri.  Looks like he won't be in surgery on my 40th birthday, after all!  I found him practicing the guitar last week.

 I also found him taking a nap.

 This one lost another tooth and dresses herself now!

 Three times a week, I've been getting back in the hang of running.  This is my best time so far.  I keep debating about a 5k in Temecula at the end of the month.  I should just pull the trigger and do it, if nothing else but to end the race with a glass of wine waiting for me!

 This kid ran for Vice President at his school.  He got it.  There was nothing I was more proud of than the way he got up early and wrote out some verses about winning and losing.  He had the right attitude and the speech he wrote on his own, with a "Just do it" at the end was pretty great too!  His Nina went out and made sure he had a cross to wear.  Grandma provided the scapular.  We provided the shark tooth.

He is turning into quite the young man.  Hard to believe that this is the last year of elementary school for him. It is hitting me, that he too is growing up and coming into his own.  

After viewing the movie "War Room" with a couple of my faith filled friends, who I cherish our time together so, Ernie helped me to create my own little room to focus in prayer.  I love it, even if Janessa told me we have to share "her personal space."  She cracks me up!

We were able to squeeze in a play date with Sarah.  It actually was a cooking afternoon.  The blueberry muffins were a crowd favorite, but the apple cake was a hit with the big kids, so. . . 

That's all for now--a whole lot of this and that, but definitely things I want to remember because the days have suddenly become shorter with everyone in school.  There is so much to be done, but right now I'm making myself enjoy this alone time with Big E.  It's like this huge gift right before I leave the decade which were my 30's. . .and into the hopeful unknown of my 40's. Life is good. Live it well.

Faith Finds Me

I have a ton to document about our trip.  I was putting it off until my first full week with my kindergartener having a longer school day. . .but as fate would have it, things changed.  I received a call Monday morning that E had hurt himself.  He called me, so I didn't panic.  He went in a car to Urgent Care, big difference from being in the ambulance three years ago.  My mind didn't wander to the worst possible scenario.  I simply waited to see what I was told.

Fast forward to the next day when we met with a specialist.  His pectoralis muscle was torn completely away from the bone, so surgery is the only way to fix it.  The doctor looked somber as he answered Ernie's questions and gave him the prognosis of being out of works for months.  Ernie looked grim too, as the news sunk in.  But I was simply at peace.

My mind focused on the fact that he was alive and this is completely fixable.  I even texted a couple friends saying, "I'm sure glad I like him so much, looks like the second honeymoon continues."  And the thing is, I meant it.  For the first time in probably forever, I didn't stress about finances or the future.  I was thankful it wasn't worse, and I just knew God would provide.

I went to the car as E waited for the referral.  It took forever, so eventually I walked back in.  He told me the doctor had called him back and wanted to know if he was willing to travel for surgery.  He wanted to get E back to normal as soon as possible and was willing to do what he could to make it happen.  Ernie was rejuvenated.  He looked hopeful as they sent us off to a local hospital for an MRI.  Once there, we realized he had forgotten his wallet, but God worked out the details and he was still able to be seen.  Then an hour into the MRI, there was an emergency and they needed to stop his session.  Ernie was able to get them to put him back in the tube only a half an hour later.  Again, God completely at work!

Even this morning, Ernie and the doctor had both already put calls in to get the surgery on the road.  We are kind of at a stall,  but it's okay.  Even if the surgery doesn't happen until
October 7th (like they're saying). . .my fortieth birthday, I'm planning on enjoying every minute the two of us have together!  It seems faith has finally found me.  All will be well.  I'm sure of it, no matter how long it takes.  In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy full, long days of one on one time with my husband.  What a gift!

School is Back in Session. . .

And I'm not really sure what I think about it yet.  After tonight, all we will have left is one more Back to School Night to get a grip on this whole high school thing.  The routine hasn't been too hard to get re-acquainted with.  It's the me here in this house alone that boggles my mind.

The first day of school E took off work to walk all the kids to school.  I thought there might be tears.  There weren't.  Grandparents and Godparents thoroughly surprised us on a quick visit on their way to the airport for a ten day vacation.  Seeing them helped my heart.  Nessa's nino came by with an offering of donuts and chocolate milk that was met with hugs and more pictures.

My last little was heading off to school and I was sad but determined to be strong so she didn't have any issues.  And she didn't.  We took some pictures, said good-bye and were on our way.  It was so strange!

 We celebrated a successful, short day with sushi, of course.

Then we went to visit papa, at his new home while his caregivers vacation.

He was pretty happy to see us and tell us about the ladies who are giving him all kinds of attention! Janessa included.

And the week has been a blur of supplies and letters and schedules. . .it's a lot to keep track of with 4 kids at 3 different schools, but I think I've got it.  Nothing is going to feel "real" until a long awaited vacation happens and my writing classes begins.  I have added another class to teach  and I'm really  looking forward to it.  It's just the strangest week with everyone in school.  The house has not been this clean in a long time. . .and it has only been three days!  We're talking windows!

Walking to school with her bff makes the day off to an even better start! 

Day 2, on my first day home alone, I came upstairs with laundry and poor little lambie, was just sitting on the floor waiting for Janessa's return.  It was the saddest sight.  I couldn't decide who was missing her more. . .

There has been plenty of time for afternoon swims. . .and it sure has been hot enough to demand our attention!

Four days in and this one was uncooperative in the picture department.  She also asked when it was a day off.  School is tough to get used to, but thankfully all of the kids have adjusted well and seem to like their teachers.  This year is going to be full.  I've already met with the school counselor to get our Character Ed program off the ground on the 31st.  I have 2 teachers who are eager for weekly help, plus my MOMS group at church. . .schedules fill up but with the things that matter most to me.  This is a dream come true. My dream.  I feel so incredibly blessed and want to always remember these days.

Summer is Officially Coming to an End. . .

I don't know how it happened, but Summer officially ends today.  Tomorrow, bright and early all four littles will be off to their first days of school!  It has been an incredible summer filled with firsts and lasts.  I am so sad to see it end, but so excited to see what this year holds.  This new beginning opens a door for me to grow my business a little and help out in the kindergarten class.  It's going to be fun!

These lasts weeks have been filled with glorious pool days with friends.

 Lunch in the park in between back-to-school shopping.

 A kindergarten kick off party with friends.

 A birthday party for the American Girl Itty Bitties: Bella and Jacob.  Because celebrations in summer are special.  And opportunities for Lene Bean to create in the kitchen are exciting to watch.

Laser tag and pizza parties with friends.

 Prayers around school campuses to cover our kids, teachers, staff, and families in prayer.  I'm so thankful for these prayer warriors in my life!

 Building card house competitions.

 Coloring outside pool side together.

 Fashion shows modeling new outfits for school.

Picnics at the park to watch airplanes take off and land, followed by a walk to the lake to see the ducks.

 Beach trip outings with large waves and searing sun.

And the best things always involve the people I love so much.  The time we spend together is treasured and the memories we made this summer run deep.  I am so blessed to be able to call this my life. My people matter most to me and this time I will never get back.  Littles, I love you like no other and have enjoyed out summer together more than you'll ever know!

Letter to my Littles: Purpose

My Dearest Littles,

In my early years, life was all about goals and my future.  I was smart, determined to do well, and true to form today, a total rule follower.  God eventually put me and dad in the same path and almost instantly I knew it would be me and him forever.  The phrase, "you will know when you know. . ." took on a whole new meaning when we met.  He wasn't my ideal mate: he had been married before, had a son, and college wasn't on his radar. But somehow those differences brought us even closer together.  Because of his past, he would be in this relationship for the long haul.  I never doubted that.  Still don't.  To be able to trust someone so completely is a gift I treasure. To not have baggage or a crazy history of on again, off again, or cheating was rare considering the relationship I came from.  But here we are, more together today, fifteen years later if that's even possible. We just complement each other.  Always have.  Always will.. . .because we've made a choice to cherish our wedding vows.  We believe in the covenant we made before God, our family, and friends. There is no other option ever than to work it out.  On this we full heartedly agree.

And then I became a mother and my whole world changed.  It exploded in even brighter colors, if that was even be possible!  All those dreams of moving up the ladder in my career, with my two Master's degrees all but evaporated into thin air, the moment I saw Lene Bean's face.  And today I recognize that I may have squandered some minutes, which turned into hours, which turned into days, which may have even turned into months. . .but I found my true purpose in this lifetime: raising you.  Everything that I had accomplished up to this point was note worthy, but my real fulfillment would be in raising you.

We had to determine that you would know our God.  We made a conscious decision to take you to church even though those days were tough and we would leave weary, but yet we kept going.  We still do. Because we realized:
4Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
         So are the children of one’s youth.

5How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them;
         They will not be ashamed
         When they speak with their enemies in the gate.--Psalm 127:4

Unbeknownst to us, our arrows would be many:  Little, Lene, Jonathan, Janessa, and eventually Anthony.  Our job? Simply to raise you right, the best way we know how. We were tasked to send our arrows out into this world to bring forth light, to love like He first loved us.  

We don't want you to look at the fragmented pieces of your family tree but instead focus on the roots we have planted here in this home and in your hearts:

"Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness."--Colossians 2:7

Our purpose is simply for you to know the Lord and to raise you to want to do His work.  This is such a huge responsibility in the broken world we live in.  Even bigger sometimes by the brokenness you've encountered in your own family relationships.  But here we are. . .all of us together.  All of us with the same beliefs, the same love for our Lord who laid down His life so that we might live, and live abundantly!  And at the end of my life. . .I (will) have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.--3John 1:4

Love you always & forever,

Mom

Always looking for the love letter: Nessa found a heart on her palm during finger painting

The Days are Long

This week was a long one.  In between a flurry of at home projects and Open Houses I've been battling a cold or allergies.  Something has me not at a hundred percent, but life goes on and there has been so much living of it to do!

She planned a birthday party for Jacob and Bella.  Such a good mama.

Breakfast at the airport:  Just the two of us

Lene was our tour guide at the Living Museum.  Wow, some parents outdid themselves! 

Being silly with my baby.

A labor of love right here.  Research report writing with Bubba was a testing of patience for sure.

His Gold Rush Project

Aqueduct.  I should have taken it from the front so you could tell.

 Monday we celebrated Aunt Lupe's life.  Janessa and Lene went with me.  I thought it was sweet that Anjalene wanted to be there for her cousin Sandra, who in reality, she hasn't spent much time with.  Janessa, my sidekick goes where I go. . .until Kindergarten starts next year!  She and Cadence during church kept me busy.

Watching Aunt Lupe's life in pictures and video.

Cousins

Cousins

Aunt Lupe would have enjoyed these two hams dancing to the mariachis after the funeral; in fact, I daresay she would have been dancing with them!

The next two weeks will be busy.  I'm ready for them, sort of.  My writing class is finished and I have some organizing to do before Summer is upon us.  First things first, I need to get well.  Resting up while E and three of the kids are out at the desert for the day. I miss them already and am looking forward to a night snuggling with my Lene Bean watching a movie on the DVR that we have put off all week.  The simple things make me happy, always.  For now, Bubba gets to watch Anne of Green Gables with me.  Lucky boy.  Lucky me!