Healthy, Happy, Beautiful

It has been so long since I've even thought about logging on to blog!

Once upon a long time ago, I thought the older the kids got, the easier it would be.  While there is some truth to the easier part in terms of they are capable of doing so much more on their own; life with four kids under this roof is bursting with activity!  With a first grader, two junior high kids, and a high school student, there are schedules to keep that require quite the commitment to organization!  Curently a tween and teen are running track at two different schools, while Lene's responsibilities with the Spring production are in full effect. Throw in youth group and faith formation for good measure and there you have three nights of the week slammed with responsiblities.

Managing school projects, homework, studying, writing class, working out, and household chores, and you have what I like to call, "organized chaos."  This has been the story of my life this year.  This is by no means meant to sound like a complaint.  Because in the moment, it sometimes feels that way, but upon reflection of this year I am struck by an overwhelming sense of joy.  I feel strong and healthy enough to manage it well most days.  I feel focused on what's most important but am learning what I can push to the wayside.  I constantly evaluate what I've added to our lives and how it serves us, whether it's a keeper or if we need to get rid of it.

This year of forty-one is surprising me.  And I've come to find out I really like surprises, as long as they aren't in the form of a surprise party where I am the guest of honor. Ha! Who knew that in focusing on my own health and fitness, I would become better equipped to handle the stressors that come with raising four kids. A smile sits at the corner of my lips with a satisfaction that is deep.  There have been some hard days in the past few months.  A couple relationships have withered and pretty much died.  There are emotions all across the board in dealing with the loss, learning to pray for reconciliation that you're never sure will really come. Having to teach your children that God is carrying you, especially when you don't feel Him. . .compounded by the female emotions and raging hormones has been challenging, but I'm still here. And I'm smiling the kind of smile that comes from a deep sense of contentment in my own skin. I am assured of God's promises, so it is easier to have the hard conversations we've been having.  God has been creating and grooming me for such a time as this. . .I feel it.  I know it to be true.  He picked me to be these kids' mother.  I am overwhelmed with gratitude!

Finally, I wish I hadn't waited so long to make time for myself to work out.  Sure I ran, but I didn't see a difference on my overall physical health.  My knee ached and still I pushed through, but incorporating weights and different types of cardio have made all the difference.  I want my kids to put their physical needs to the forefront--it will help them in all areas of life and I hope they learn this by my example.  Food is fuel and we can not simply keep running on fumes.  I wonder how much healthier, how much happier I might have been in the early years of raising littles if I had known what I know today.  I'm stronger today than yesterday and I'm pushing through because my health matters and I am important in the lives of these humans.

Summer is Officially Coming to an End. . .

I don't know how it happened, but Summer officially ends today.  Tomorrow, bright and early all four littles will be off to their first days of school!  It has been an incredible summer filled with firsts and lasts.  I am so sad to see it end, but so excited to see what this year holds.  This new beginning opens a door for me to grow my business a little and help out in the kindergarten class.  It's going to be fun!

These lasts weeks have been filled with glorious pool days with friends.

 Lunch in the park in between back-to-school shopping.

 A kindergarten kick off party with friends.

 A birthday party for the American Girl Itty Bitties: Bella and Jacob.  Because celebrations in summer are special.  And opportunities for Lene Bean to create in the kitchen are exciting to watch.

Laser tag and pizza parties with friends.

 Prayers around school campuses to cover our kids, teachers, staff, and families in prayer.  I'm so thankful for these prayer warriors in my life!

 Building card house competitions.

 Coloring outside pool side together.

 Fashion shows modeling new outfits for school.

Picnics at the park to watch airplanes take off and land, followed by a walk to the lake to see the ducks.

 Beach trip outings with large waves and searing sun.

And the best things always involve the people I love so much.  The time we spend together is treasured and the memories we made this summer run deep.  I am so blessed to be able to call this my life. My people matter most to me and this time I will never get back.  Littles, I love you like no other and have enjoyed out summer together more than you'll ever know!

Restore & Refresh

In addition to putting down my iphone and staying away from Instagram, I also signed myself up for an online workshop during the Lenten season.  "Restore Workshop is a six week online course geared towards adult women who have struggled or are struggling with or want to avoid burnout. It is for any woman who wants to nurture joy within her life and the lives of those around her."  For some odd reason, after a year of book club, and four years of leading a Good Morning Girls group, teaching part time, and mothering around the clock on top of being a God-loving wife. . .I found myself on the brink of burn out.  I was doing, but without the passion and drive that had once fueled me.  My tank was empty and I felt ready to crash and burn.  Unfortunately, those who would suffer most would be my family.

Thank God, I recognized the road I was headed down.  I knew I was distracted.  I knew I was tired of leading.  I knew I was comparing and I also knew that comparison was the thief of joy.  I completed my last session of Good Morning Girls and am on an official hiatus.  Letting go of that responsibility alone made me look forward to my morning quiet  time where I could now FOCUS on the workshop and its daily reflections that were beginning to restore my enthusiasm for my role as wife, mom, and daughter of the King. All the things I was doing in His name,  meant nothing if my heart wasn't in it and I wasn't seeking Him first in my own daily relationship.  Doing something out of habit without the heart, wasn't filling up my tank. Lesson learned. But I will probably need a reminder down the road. Just keeping it real!

Spring break came along at just the right moment and Sunday we spent some family time outside bike riding. I am realizing that I need to keep stepping out of my comfort zones when it comes to fully doing life with my kids.  Dad is the active one, the adventurer, the explorer. . .and some of their best memories I'm not a part of because I've stayed behind or opted to grocery shop or clean.  Really?!!!! These kids are growing up right before my eyes and I better ride bikes with them while they still want me to! So what if the hills around the lake make me nervous!  Get over it, J!

Monday, we had a friend over and the girls got away for some girl time.  Usually Lene Bean is treated to a mani/pedi at her birthday only--it's a ritual my aunt started with her when she was about five.  But Little's girlfriend had offered to take her. . .and she really wanted to go, so I jumped right in and said we would all meet her there.  Even Nessa had her nails painted and adorned with polka-dots. Sometimes it's a nice surprise to do the thing you don't usually splurge on!

Lunch concluded our girl time out together.  The rest of the afternoon was spent with the kids singing, dancing, collecting worms, playing house, playing tennis, and just a jovial time of kids being kids!

Today I knew I wanted to cease another free day, but what to do, what to do?  Val's sister-in-law recommended the arboretum.  I can't even remember the last time I was there, so off we went.

Ten kids and SO much to see. . .it felt refreshing and rejuvenating to be outside enjoying God's beautiful earth.  I loved watching the kids explore. I loved exploring beside them: turtles, waterfalls, peacocks, the scent of orange blossoms. . .add someone else's kid sinking in the mud into the mix and you have the complete trip!  It's not an adventure unless something unexpected takes place!

Sometimes some cousin time is just what the doctor ordered!  Add to that the realization that true friends really do become family: love and friendship are blessings we should not take for granted.  I love that this bench shot serves as that reminder.

I'm always taking the pictures, but today I wanted to reflect and remember this day trip that refreshed my soul.  I felt so happy to be with my kiddos today. 

After, we went out to eat and then headed home to tell daddy all about our adventures. While Lene worked on some research for a school project, Nessa requested some homework so we did a little shared writing activity.  I think we make a great team!

And as if the day could have been any better. . .my biggest littles began writing stories about a concept that they had discussed with their grandpa over a month ago: Mrs. Pimplebottom.  It was awesome to see them working side by side, totally engaged in the adventures they were creating.  Neither wanted to go to bed--they were THAT into their stories.

I have come to expect this creativity from Anjalene. . .but Bubba?  Tonight was new for him. He may have lifted a few ideas from listening to his sister's read aloud to me, but all in all, he was really into it and excited about his creation. I love their imaginations! 

Tonight's takeaway:  We all have stories to tell.  Just as we all have a life to live.  It can only  be our best life if we avoid comparisons with others and try to stay true to who God is calling us to be.  I love that when I stop listening to outside influences and the goings on of others, I feel most able to hear God's voice in my own life.  Let's just say, I've been hearing a lot lately. . .but I'll save that for another post. Two days into Spring Break and my soul is definitely being restored!