Festivities at Forty

That smile of his melts my heart. Always.

I had this kind of awakening this weekend.  Not necessarily a good one but one that left me with a different way to look at a situation. After too many funerals and diagnosis' of beloved friends over the last couple months, I wanted to celebrate Ernie's 40th.  What better reason to get together than for a happy occasion?

It was relatively small and some of our closest friends couldn't be there due to vacation plans which was a little disappointing, because truth be told. . .we just don't really try to get together anymore.  Now that our friends have kids who are grown, it seems like schedules have just taken a life of their own.  And I get it.  I do.  It just disappoints my heart a little, but then I'm filled with hope for the future when schedules might open up and we can reconnect.

I guess I have a different expectation for family, and I shouldn't.  Someone I love a lot once told me, my kids may be my world, but they aren't everyone else's.  Point taken. But for me, family has become my world--and it boggles my mind when it's not everyone else's. I guess my expectation for my family is similar to my parent's expectation for me when I was a teen and college aged: you show up.  You don't have to stay the entire time, but you make an appearance.  That's something that was expected of me and I've really come to own it and still follow through today as much as I can.  So when immediate family can't be somewhere special, not even for a little while. . .it stings a bit. My husband goes above and beyond to so many people, I just really wanted him to feel and be celebrated.  That's what good wives do, I suppose.

But the next morning, sitting outside having coffee with my fine forty-year-old, in his divine wisdom, said, "It's more important to me the people who were there then the ones who weren't."  This coming from the guy who had to pick up and drop off his own dad just so he could attend... And I realized he is right.  First off, not everyone has our strong value of family first.  Secondly, sometimes other plans come first--even if it doesn't make any sense to me.

Our kids and Lene's best friend, Layla did all the set up under the guidance of me, grandma, and grandpa. They cleaned, decorated, and were so extremely helpful and honestly happy to do so.  That in and of itself was such a gift.  Our comadre offered to make Ernie's favorite dessert, not only enough for him, but for the entire party. It was such a blessing.  Her husband rushed off to get ice for us while E was gone picking up his dad last minute, no questions asked. . .he just went and did what needed to be done.  Blessed.  My mom went above and beyond to offer all that she had to make centerpieces and such.  And then I forgot to take pictures of the finished project! Her generosity is like no other. My dad, offering the house so they could attend without needing a caregiver for papa was so appreciated!  They made the party!

I didn't take many pictures because I was honestly paying so much attention to the moments. . .the unexpected ones happening right in front of me with people who were there to celebrate the incredible man my husband is.  I have been reminded on more than one occasion recently by how incredibly blessed I am to do life with this man.   Even if we were the only people at the party, it would have been enough.  I am so thankful for the opportunity to celebrate life while the living is here to experience it.  I am so thankful for the strong family ties we are instilling in our children.  I am so thankful for friends who show up and love on my man, who deserves to be honored every day of the year. 40 years in the books. . .now we wait for my turn.