Easter 2023

He is risen! Stay risen!

It's in the darkest hour when your thoughts catch up with you. I've been awake since three am. I didn't even try to go back to sleep. Instead, I've been reading these snippets of a life that seems forever ago. I hope one day these blog posts serve as a reminder to my kids of the good life we have been fortunate enough to live.  Maybe it is in this season of mourning that these memories are especially comforting. They remind me,  that was before. This is now.

We just celebrated our first Easter without my mom and brother. To be honest, we have not typically celebrated Easter together since my parent's divorce five years ago so it didn't feel  that  different. I remember the first Easter after they separated and knew being together would be too hard for us, so we began to visit and stay with E's family out of state. It was the one holiday, I told my Mom we had to have with his family. She understood. This year we actually were on a camp trip to wind down multiple conflicting spring breaks. It was good for my senses to be out in nature. I love the beach. My brother loved the beach too. My mom, not so much. . .but she was a good sport about it. The sunrises and sunsets were painted masterpieces across the sky that I needed to see: God's glory in full effect during Holy Week.

We went to church later than usual. We ate dinner with my Dad and Anthony, texted with our oldest and his wife. Lene and I visited Uncle Craig because I know my Mom would have. I missed seeing all the cousins together, but I was right where I needed to be. I'm in a season that needs to figure out what I need. I am missing the people who I shared the most life with. I am giving myself permission to be where I need to be. I am giving myself permission to be who I need to be. I am asking questions that need to be asked as I'm on the rounding up to fifty spectrum. We are making plans just in case, because. . .we've experienced tragedy and then tragedy again. We can never be too prepared.

It's four am. I go to the gym at 5:30. I work at 7:45. In this quiet moment, thoughts of my past bring me comfort and joy. Grief is lonely, even when you are blessed with the most incredible friends, you feel alone in your struggles. Grief and joy, such conflicting emotions as a son readies to turn 18 and graduate. Life keeps moving forward. Ready or not. What is it I want most? Where do I want to go? How do I want to live? These are the questions my three am brain yearns to answer. This post is all over the place. . .kind of like my sleepy three am brain, I guess.

Easter 2023

Uncle Craig: Easter 2023

Easter 2017

Best we could get. . .

I love her quirky sense of style.

Monroe was old enough to find eggs with a little help.

Nina and her girl.

After the Easter Egg hunt.

Nino with his little ladies.

Spring Break 2015

How we've gotten to Summer without me posting about our Spring Break is beyond me!  Stranger things have happened, but geeze, where did the time go?  This Spring Break found us needing a get away.  There was a lot going on and we were just tired.  We needed to be refreshed and we needed time to just be. Anthony stayed with his dad for a couple days so we booked a hotel on the bay and headed out to the Newport beach. It was the kind of vacation that is imprinted on my heart forever.

 One of our nights there, the big kids: Little and Kendra came down to show us his new truck.  They stayed for dinner right on the water.  The food was just okay but the company was terrific!

We came home Easter Sunday, but not before attending mass at a neighboring church.  The service was great and the kids liked the donut option before mass started.

 Our view from the balcony

 We decided on A Thousand Steps beaches because I remembered it from my college days.  Let me tell you, it did not disappoint.  Look at that!  God's beauty at its finest right there!

 I love everything about our pictures at sunset.  When I was in college, I would drive to the beach just to watch the sun set so watching it set with my kids dancing and playing in the fore front?  A small preview of heaven.

 Walking the pier and someone got tired.

 I think I might get these blown up on a canvas.  I love them THAT much!  This particular picture reminds me to pause and take it all in: the beauty and the chaos and to count it all as joy!

 Big. Medium. Little.

 Good Friday quiet time in the hotel room.  Tradition.

 The ferry.

After our quiet time, on Good Friday, we began walking to Joe's Crab Shack for Dinner since it was Friday and all.  As we were walking, I believe Lene directed us all to look in the sky.  There was an inverted rainbow clear as day.  The kids were super excited that God chose that moment, hours after his death to remind us about His promise.  My mama heart was so full it could have burst!

In These Parts. . .

Last week, the big littles competed in a district track meet. They had been practicing at lunch for the the last couple of weeks.  I'm so proud of both of them for getting out there and trying something new, even if it did mean I needed to do some nudging.  Jonathan is fast on his feet. . .small but mighty and I know he was surprised by how well he did.  His relay team advances to the Regionals held May 3rd. 

Easter came and went. We didn't make it to sunrise service, due to the fun night we had before.  One of the moms organized a flashlight egg hunt which means the kids had a blast searching for eggs in the dark, but we got home and into bed later than usual.  We had quite the spot outside on the grass at ten o clock mass though.  Father Peter Dennis did not disappoint.  I have loved him since my elementary school years! Blessed by his marrying us and just so happy when he is at mass!

The kids saw no candy in their baskets this year, but I don't think they minded.  Books were a fast fave as they went through their goodies.  After mass, we headed to Ernie's sister to visit his mom.  It was quiet.  His dad was there too, so we had a nice visit and I got to taste her greens before I left--delicious!!! Our kids are the only littles so they've learned to bring a book or to color while they answer questions about what's going on in their lives.  I think Grandma enjoyed seeing their happy faces for the while we were there.

We headed straight from there to my mom and dads.  As usual grandma had outdone herself. She simplified on the food this year which was awesome to see. . .but the egg hunt had money eggs color coordinated for each of the kids.  They were SO excited! We might have sent them on an even wilder goose chase by miscounting the eggs, but we will never tell!

It was a small gathering this year--and so nice sometimes when it's just the cousins playing and being kids.  For the most part everyone gets along and just appreciates the fact that they are together.  Not a bad day to spend celebrating our Jesus who died and rose from the dead!  Not a bad way, indeed!

It seems with Easter so late, that it was a busy time--much busier than I like with a birthday on Good Friday, but I like that we were all able to relax and get some fun in before it was off to school and work the very next day.  I miss that Spring Break no longer coordinates with the Easter holiday.  It really was quite the bummer to call the day over so soon so we could bathe and get into bed ready for a full week of school. Sigh. . .summer countdown is SO on!

Easter Wrap Up

 Our Easter celebration started off a little early this year with Janessa's first real life encounter with the Easter bunny.  It paid a visit to her preschool class and she seemed to take a liking to it, along with the three eggs she found during their hunt.

Her friend Linky may just be her main motivation for getting to school each week.  These two get along so well and she looks forward to seeing him on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  She even was able to stay with him while I was at the dentist this week and they had so much fun, she was sad to have to come home.  Fancy that!

Easter sunrise service dawned quite early since we had been out the night before at a dinner party at a friend's.  The kids had a blast (as did we) and they were worn out by the time they finally hit the pillows after eleven o'clock!  Their early morning faces weren't as chipper as usual with the lack of sleep, but mass was outside and perfect and we happened to run into Uncle, Grandma and Grandpa there as well.  It was nice to celebrate mass together.  After we met up with some more family and were off to IHOP for an early breakfast, followed by naps for all.

We didn't have Easter here this year since Papa hasn't been doing too great with getting around.  I guess it was nice to not have to do everything with the lack of sleep we had, but I did miss having it here.  Grandma outdid herself (*as always) and we met up with my brothers there later in the afternoon for dinner.

I can not believe It is April.  I love that the bigger kids really understand what Easter is all about. . .and I love spending time with my family.  Blessed abundantly . . .