Birthday Blessings, Bubbba!

April 18, 2019

Dear Bubba,

Happy 14th Birthday, son!! Today marks the beginning of your 14th year. . .a year that will begin with endings as you prepare to promote to high school!  Three years of middle school have come and gone--soon you will be a Freshman at Bonita HIgh School! I can not even begin to tell you how proud of you I am. As a student, as a Web Leader, as an athlete, as a brother, and as a son. You've always had a giant heart, sought out the lonely, the bullied, those deemed different from others. I've admired that about you. You do what is right. You go against the grain and you genuinely are such a good boy.

This year has been rough. Friends are growing and changing stretching and you feel like your turn will never come. You pray to grow. And you will, son. God's timing is generally different from the time frame we want, So I just encourage you to embrace who God made you to be for now. To know you will stretch and grow eventually and not to stay focused on the height you are right now. Do the things you rhink you can't. Enjoy working our side by side with Dad. Embrace the lessons and training high school soccer camp will offer you. Be open to new opportunities and be positive that your high school years will be some of the best of your life!

You have exceeded our expectations with your studies. Honor roll, doing everything on your own, not needing to be pushed or tracked by us. This skill will help you in high school. You are ready, son! On the soccer field and track your God given skill has taken you far, now just listen to the coaches. Let them grow you as an athlete. Trust the process and be a good listener. We always can improve upon things, that is not a critisicm--it is a truth that applies to all of us. As a brother, stay connected to Ernie and Anthonu who will no longer be under our roof, but they are your male role models who will be there for you. As a little brother to Lene and a big brother to Nessa, stay involved. Talk to them, make time to do things with them. I want your relationship with your siblings to be even stronger than mine and dad's are with our siblings. Relationships take work. Invest the time and do the work now, This is holy, holy work, son.

Finally, this year you've really showed your compassion with G-pa and handloing their divorce with a wisdom and understanding I wish I had. I love that you want to see them happy and you inquire and talk to grandpa often to make him know that you are okay with whatever journey his life takes. Keep asking the questions, keep listening to the answers, and keep loving people, especially family members who may have disappointed you up to this point.

We love you. We always will. You are exactly who God made you to be--perfect in his likeness. You are going to do great things--you already have! You make me proud to be your Mom, son, Happiest of birthdays to you. I love you to the end of the world, across the universe times a billion.

XOXOXO

Mom

Spring Choir Concert

 Choir performances are Grandma's favorite.  She's always there to cheer the kids on and enjoys their shows immensely.  One of the reasons Jonathan stuck with choir this year was because he knew how much Grandma enjoyed the shows.  This 80's concert did not disappoint!

Track Meet

Jonathan was 1 of 2 sixth grade students who made the track team this year.  This is not surprising, as running is his gift.  He particpated in the relay and the team did well overall.  I think it was a boost to his confidence to be running and working with upper graders.

Waiting to cheer on her brother

Can't wait to see him out there next season. His mile time is currently 6 minutes and 7 seconds.  He's running hard and fast to get his five minute mile shirt.  We know he can do it!!!

Invention Convention Winners

These guys came in second place for their Cool Head invention.  Proud of their effort and hard work!

Love Letters

He has always stopped to pick me flowers.
Now he looks for any and every sign of love to share with me, his mama.
He has my heart...in the palm of his hand.  May he always be a noticer of the love letters God leaves for us everywhere.

Traditions

Traditions have found us through the years of parenting littles.  During the holiday season, walking through a living nativity has been a long standing tradition that the kids won't consider missing out on.  This year with the addition of tickets, the wait time was nothing, which made it easy to enjoy.  I'm noticing more and more with a six year old now, that most events are easier now because the "baby" has grown up.  There's no need for strollers, diaper bags, snacks. . .we just go and adventure together.

 Last year we added a Journey Through Bethlehem into our "Things to do" at Christmas time.  It is a reanactment of the town of Bethlehem, the market place.  The kids loved it last year and we were able to bring Ernie with us this year to experience.  I love that Jesus is the focus.  I especially love that the kids still want to do these kids of activities.

 Last minute, grandma decided to make some tamales so I took the girls over to help.  It was further confirmation that Janessa is growing up.  To see her spreading masa and wanting to be helpful was a moment of gratitude for me.

This year, since Jonathan's gift is running, he was the only one who even wanted to do the Penguin Waddle.  He showed up, gave it his all and came in first for ten year olds, and fourth overall with 10-12 year olds.  He ran fast and then needed his inhaler. . .which I forgot!

And Christmas is officially ten days away. . .no idea how that happened so quickly!

Track Meets

So we always remember this year:  Jonathan came in first place in the relay, 100 and 200 at our district track meet.

Bubba and Mikah with their wins.

Ethan, his friend on the relay and Bubba with their wins.

Taking it all in.   So serious.

Leading.

Finished with 3 golds.

So he moved on the the San Gabriel Valley All Districts meet.  Here he placed second in the relay, 100, and 200.

Round three was ALL Valleys.  He placed sixth in the 100 and last in the 200.  It was a long day with boys who towered over him but a good experience and if he wants it bad enough, he can try again next year.

Finished for the season and that's okay.

Run the Race

This weekend concluded our track season.  It was the SCMAV finals.  Basically, Jonathan placed first in our school district for the relay, 100, and 200.  At the valley meet, he placed second in all of his events.

Yesterday's meet was to determine if he was going to state.  It was a hot day.  It was a long day, and he didn't fare as well as he had hoped.  In the first heat he came in third, which was okay for him. He was used to being near the top.  Two hours later in the finals. . .the race finished so close they had to review the tapes and Jonathan did not like the outcome.  In his mind he had finished third, but they called it a sixth place finish. The boys came in with a tenth of a second between them.  It was that close!  The injustice of it was written all over his face.  He was not happy and he was not allowed off the field as he still had another race to run--a longer one.

I watched from the side, then I tried to get close to talk to him through a gate, but it was useless.  He was mad and he couldn't see me.  I wanted this for him, because he wanted it.  But truth be told, he didn't want it that bad.  He wasn't training for it at home or doing any extra running besides what took place on the playground during school hours.  And that's okay.  But it was hard looking at his disappointed face.  I prayed him through it from afar and hoped his poor attitude would disappear.  That he would appreciate the fact that he had come this far.  That was an accomplishment in and of itself!

God was good, and Jonathan came out to use the restroom and put down his ribbon.  He was still mad.  I could tell.  But I had a moment with him alone and said, "Did you do your best?"  With downcast eyes he muttered, "yes." "Then that's all that matters.  Try having fun out there, son."    He trotted off with a little more of a bounce in his step, and not so sullen.

The minutes sitting in the hot sun wore on, and his uncle, aunt, and cousins showed up.  There was no way to tell him he had an audience as he was on the field.  The gun blasted and he ran.  And he came in last place.  He honestly didn't look like the same kid out there.  His effort was slim to none, and he was enveloped between boys so much taller than him you had to wonder, are they really only ten?  I was nervous walking over to him after.  I couldn't bear to see him downcast and sullen as his family looked on and had come such a far distance to watch him. I didn't want him not to appreciate their presence. I didn't want him making excuses or angry. My stomach was in knots as I wondered what one uncle would say as his bluntness and sarcasm can be a little much on my little softies heart.  But I need not have worried.  My son pranced off the field, relief written all over his face. He exhaled as I embraced him saying, "Geeze, I'm sure glad that's over!"  Before bursting into a grin.  He started talking fast, "I don't think dad's technique worked. I decided to just try it and I think it slowed me down instead of speeding me up."  I laughed.

And then we found our family.  And everyone voiced what I had been thinking before. . .do these kids have to show birth certificates?  They are giants!  There was laughter and then some good natured races between them across school grounds.  All in good fun!

There was more laughter.  It's as if the losses were already forgotten.  He got further than he did the year before and that was enough.  It's funny because we always thought Jonathan would be part of a team, but God has other plans and we're filled with hope that there's a future in running.  With some training and time, he will continue to race and have fun with it (we hope).  The losses will still come, but hopefully he will learn how to deal with the disappointment and always try his best.  We are very proud of his accomplishment this year on the track field.  Win or lose, how he walked off the track that second time, made my mama heart soar.

Dear Birthday Boy

Dearest Bubba,

It has been a strange week leading up to your entry into double digits.  You literally blew me away last week at your track meet. Five races, where you ran your way to first place status each time, gave me pause.  Where is my little boy?  How have those legs carried you so far away from the pack in the race and why are they leading the way to this next decade of your life?  Time is cruel.  It is a race I was never prepared for, and it keeps going, so here I am saying, "Happy 10th Birthday, Son."

Bubs, I recently saw, of all things, a tatoo that stated a truth I want you to learn young. . ."Change is the only constant." And this has definitely been a year full of changes for you, our family, our household.  Of all my children, you are the one who struggles with any kind of change the most; therefore, I know this year has not been easy.  I know you've struggled with disappointments from people you love.  I know what a soft heart you have and that it hurts easily.  I also know some of the bruising has probably come from me in moments where my harsh tone or words did not fit the offense.  And as I have already told you far too many times this year, I am truly sorry.

I forgot how it feels to be on the verge of growing up. I never had to share my room with anyone.  I never had to share my parents with anyone.  I never watched that dance and now daddy and I dance it daily and son, it is hard.  We make many mistakes, of this I know for sure.  But you are not a mistake.  You were born to be ours.  You were born with a heart of compassion and eyes for justice.  You have stepped out and shown who you are becoming.  I know your life verse is Philippians 4:13  "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength," but son, the Lord has been placing a new verse on my heart and He is showing me that it is just for you as we enter a new decade of your life:  "He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."--Micah 6:8

There is something about who you are that my mama heart just knows has to pray for the wonderful things you will do for His kingdom over time.  Raising a Kingdom Kid with eyes like you have, who seeks out the broken, voices concern for people afraid to speak, and who can win races and know that it was not of your ability but because of God's given gift to you--all those qualities make for a kid who is already in tune with God's call on his life and totally open to the possibilities of his future! And to think, we have the privilege and joy to call you son!

From leadership to track to Pokemon cards. . .this year has been full of new opportunities to grow you.  I still remember that first week of school when I told you I just couldn't sit and help you with every detail of your homework.  I mean, you were in 4th grade!  From that day forward, you came in and did what needed to be done, only asking me for help on occasion.  Amazing what you can accomplish when you're pushed outside your comfort zone a little.  Hot lunch on Thursdays, Character Counts blue, College shirt day, Leadership shirt day--I watch the week fly by by the shirt you wear.  But I am so proud that you put yourself out there this year and tried new things!

I loved our desert trip to the mine, and the flowers you still gather for me.  I love your laugh and smile.  Your eyes can see into my soul.  They undo me in the best possible way because I know you get it. . .ALL of it! You see the good before the bad and I love that about you.  You've been the man of the house checking doors and lights when dad has to work and I have thoroughly enjoyed our Frisbee afternoons at the park.  Actually, I'm ready for summer nights that we can play!  I don't even mind that you beat me in steps every day.  I am four times as old as you, and not nearly as good at dropping everything to just run and play!  I really do need to work on that!  

I am so excited to see what the Lord has planned for your life.  You are such a gift to me, son.  I love you forever and ever to the moon and back times a thousand million zillion. . .until the end of time!

I hope your day and your ten-year-old adventure is memorable.  I can't wait to hear all about it!

All my love always,

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Mom