That's All She Wrote

Papa celebrated 91 years young!

2014 is a thing of the past.  Onward and upward as we have already welcomed 2015 in to our humble midst. With the holidays behind us, and another year in the books, I have been thinking about the lessons learned this year as I tried to FOCUS on what was most important--the life right in front of my face.

What a great life it is!  And what an even greater gift I've been given in recognizing it and clinging on to it and opening it up to someone who didn't have the luxuries afforded us.  This home, which was once referred to as "the little old lady who lived in a shoe. . ." as a means to persuade me that we have in fact outgrown the place. . .opened itself to our 13-year-old "brother."  He doesn't complain about the size of this space. Because it has become his home.  And home truly is where your heart is.  Pay no mind to how big or how small, if you shift your perspective you are able to clearly see:  Small homes grow tight families. And what we have is clearly enough.

Take for example, another luxury afforded me:  staying home with my children.  To some, there is little benefit of being home all day when kids may be in school.  There is money to be earned, trips to take, and futures to plan for.  But the thing is:  I want to be home.  I desire to make my husband, kids and home a priority: an inspiring, inviting, cozy place.   And together, E and I have decided that this life we are leading is enough. Today is a gift we are not taking for granted.  We may sacrifice additional income, but the benefits of me being home far outnumber the down side. . .FOR US.  But every family is different. I know this.  And I respect this.

2014 was my year to walk on water--to not take my eyes upon the Lord and know what?  God has not disappointed.  He has provided countless opportunities for me to do what I love and use the gifts He has blessed me with.  I think to myself, WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO PRACTICE WHAT I PREACHED?  His plans for me are always so much greater than my own.  Faith is complete confidence or trust in God...I knew what it meant but still wanted to play it safe and live by my own standard of secure. What an awakening it has been to KNOW Him in this way.  It truly is an amazing gift!  One I do not take for granted, nor is it one I will be silenced about.  People can refer to me as "too into the bible."  In fact, I will take that as a compliment.  I am far from perfect, but I know I serve a perfect God who doesn't make mistakes and who wants us to follow Him and his ways.

I have entered into this new year with full JOY.  

"These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full."--John 15:11

I want to hold on to the joy.  I want to embrace what each glorious moment has to offer, even in the chaotic confusion of hectic daily life, homeschool lessons gone awry, and days I'm just plain, old worn out from the raising of four littles under foot.  I want to count it all as JOY.  I want to choose joy, even in the hard times, even during decisions that have to be made but especially in all the moments that are spent together as a family or in community. JOY is contagious.  I'd like to spread it around too.  I tell my kids often, who you are at home, is who you really are.  And I want to be filled with joy so it spills over into their lives, and douses all our interactions.  This joyful countenance to be able to live the life I never even allowed myself to dream of needs to be outwardly displayed daily; moment by moment. . .in smiles, and gestures, actions, and affirming words.  I want HIS JOY in me and I want it to be full.  And I have the power to make that happen if I live with eyes wide open and full of gratitude, but mostly if I CHOOSE joy.  This year I am choosing JOY.  Join me?

Lives Well Lived

It's hard to believe that the picture above to the left was taken nearly eleven years ago on our wedding day.  All four family members who were present at the above table are now gone.  My Aunt Dorothy, the oldest of the siblings, passed away Friday at the age of ninety-six.  Her wit, sharp mind, and love of life was evident in the busy life she lived.  She was extremely social and looked forward to many daily occurrences with her friends.  They played cards, had potlucks and celebrated life together.  We went to visit her a while back and she was so proud of her roses. . .another pleasure she found that added beauty and longevity to her life.

I looked forward to our yearly reunions on the first of the year as we had football pools, chicken, and lots of laughs.  This year was the first time I can remember her not being there--as she was recovering from a bout of pneumonia.  I write about her here in this space because I want my kids to know the value of hard work and who my great aunts and uncles were.  They grew up fast, having lost their father at an early age; they had many responsibilities and lived through the Great Depression.  They valued family first and foremost.  They all worked hard at their jobs and in their marriages.  I want my kids to see these people as our past who paved the way for our present and I want them to aspire great lives of love and sacrifice in their own homes, with their own families in their futures.


Who we are today is a result of the love and sacrifices of the family who was here first.  I feel like some of us  have forgotten that core nucleus that we claim as our own to:  sports, activities, careers, quest for more money, and more things. . . I want what they used to have.  I will fight for my nightly dinners together as a family, more real life connection with my parents, brothers and their families.  I will fight for our Friday Family Fun nights, and leisure walks on the weekend, rest on the Sabbath Day, and traditions that are meaningful and valuable to shaping our hearts, not succumbing to the pressures or expectations of the world. 

The ending of that generation does not need to symbolize the ending of ideals that were family focused.  I have the power for their memories and love to live on in the lives we lead with our own children.  As a tribute to my grandparents, great aunts and uncles who have gone before me, I will continue to love longer, deeper, with intention and focus so that we have the kind of family that is close in hearts.

January 6, 2012

Amidst organizing, cleaning, and looking for documents for a refinance. . .

the week has been filled with simple, everyday moments that leave me refreshed.

Yesterday while I frantically looked for tax documentation that was m.i.a.,

I asked the kids to play in the back yard.   

It was a little too quiet, so I went to see what they were up to.

The baby had taken off her shirt and was sitting in a patio chair working on stacking beads, you know the kind you're supposed to string..

She was completely unaware of my watching her.

I had time to run in and get the camera and snap these pictures as I watched from behind the lens: 

her focus and determination obvious.

She worked slowly.

She worked mindfully.

She made it look effortless.

One on top of the other: circles, squares, orange, green.

There was no rhyme or reason to how she stacked.

She simply stacked.

She kept her hand firmly on the bead until she was certain it was stable.

Then she released and went through the process again.

Up. Up. Up it went until on the ninth or tenth bead it crashed to the table...

and she started the process again.

There were no tears, no anger, nor did she turn away from the task at hand.

She simply started again.

That's what I will do in those bad mothering moments that happen from time to time.

Or how about the bad wife moments? Yuck!

I will focus on the task at hand: cultivating a warm, nurturing home full of love and raising my children. 

I will simply start again.  Hour by hour, even minute by minute on really bad days.

I will go to the Lord and He will show me how it's done.

He is ever present.

“But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”  

2 Chronicles 15:7

Go on. Go to God--JF